The Foreign Correspondents Club of Thailand unfortunately has had to cancel its evening with Colonel Werachon the Army spokesman tomorrow night – But fear not! A star reporter is on the scene and he is bringing us some dramatic coverage as events unfold in Thailand.

Apparently dodging bullets this highly decorated -(well he is if you read his biography) American has been in the thick of it in Bangkok and willing to challenge the army head on.

In an exclusive, this hot Knoxville educated ‘journalist’, who has been signing himself on the net as a member of the FCCT , has broken a story which the combined talents of the Bangkok press corps have missed.
He has found gunshots and bloodshed where nobody else thought of looking.
 He give us this headline dated May 23rd 2014 above a lifted picture of a red-shirt gathering.
Wow I missed that event, well not a similar one a few years ago,  then again I am not searching ‘divorce in thailand’. every day for my Coup news.
But this intrepid hack leaves then no stone unturned. 
He surfaces in Bangkok for a selfie next to a soldier at Ekamai bus station (cover picture) and informs us he will keep us up to date with events as they take place, as he follows the news on ‘Line’ – By this time though he has forgotten about his earlier headline – but he still tells people to stay in Pattaya.
But perhaps the best exclusive of all is when he announces that the coup leaders have cut taxes for foreigners.
Yes, you have guessed. Of course when I said ‘Star’ reporter, I of course meant #DrewNoyes a man who was exposed in the Morning Star newspaper in North Carolina as a man of myriad lies, (Pages 1 and 3) who faced accusations of property and share fraud, sexual harassment and producing a completely bogus résumé of his career, long before he came to Thailand.
According to Noyes Thailand’s new military government will be giving great tax cuts to foreigners who own land or houses (illegally presumably) in Thai company names.

Its a tax bonanza! He seems to have jumped the gun on this announcement though. The military government’s first priority is to pay off the rice farmers a matter of a few billion dollars.

Personally though I would be quite scared now if I owned a house in a shell company Drew Noyes had provided.

But wait – there is another coup bonus he announces: CNN, he says, has announced that the military coup will be good for business!
So all you investors in Thailand put your money down now and consult:
One Stop Service Center. a rip off of the government One-Stop-One-Start Centre, has replaced his PAPPA Co.Ltd., which incidentally will not benefit much from the tax cuts. It has taken full benefits already not having paid tax for the last four years.
Drew Walter Noyes says he is reporting from the frontline, with Sifu McInnes and five others according to his Facebook page. Sifu McInnes ia a controversial New Zealander and former head apparently of the Pattaya Swat Team.
This is the team which was filmed on ‘Big Trouble in Tourist Thailand’ conducting a chase through the streets of Pattaya firing out of their yellow ‘Humvee’.  I think he was told later to scale down his operation. No wonder Thailand’s Public Relations Department and Film Office had kittens.
Sifu Mcinnes with guns and his Humvee : Pic: PDN
If that is true, boy is Mr. Noyes in good company breaking the usual rule ‘What happens in Pattaya stays in Pattaya’.
Noyes has himself pictured on Facebook claiming friendship with the highest of the high in Thailand. And in the Pattaya Times an attempt at a newspaper which folded two years ago he still carries this headline!
“I am an editor with a newspaper. You are just a common journalist,” he told a member of the FCCT not so long ago*.  He also claimed in a written statement that he tried to circulate that the same FCCT journalist wrote that his wife was providing oral sex services to foreigners in Pattaya – though we have yet to find that story.

Despite his claim to be a member of the FCCT and an expert on defamation law his application to the club was rejected. This had nothing to the oral sex services which I should point out his wife did not provide. She has moved out.

Drew Noyes’ personal experience entails mainly losing libel cases.
Warning:  Followers of Drew Noyes tweets, Facebook entries, and stuff on his sites – such as divorceinthailand should be cautious. He may be trying to drive business to his site.

Mr. Noyes is currently on trial for alleged extortion in Pattaya. He is also being sued by a Dutchman for 2.5 million he says Noyes and his wife pocketed.
Drew Noyes reporting under-cover in Pattaya. He claims he was trying to safeguard Pattaya from dodgy businesses
when he allegedly demanded one business owner cough first 7 million, then reduced to 2.3 million baht

#DrewNoyes will be able to save on his florist bill. The commander of Pattaya Police for whom he has been saving his best bouquets departed in a hurry a few days ago before the Navy called.

Apparently the man whom he says was going to put an end to corruption was wanted for…well I don’t know.

Footnote: Drew Noyes’  AskThailandPolice website in which he encourages foreigners to report foreign crime to him has now expired.

Meanwhile Mr. Noyes has announced: “We will be holding a seminar with the Royal Thai Army in a month…. The seminar has nothing to do with the soldier at the bus station. haha”.

*me actually


  1. Thailand's most deluded and dysfunctional American bullshitter just never misses an opportunity to appear relevant. With his exposure as a two-bit conman now widely known, we can only speculate what nefarious schemes his perverted mind is trying to formulate.

  2. His other site site carries a logo stolen from the American television program Divorce Court. Divorce Court is produced by Monet Lane Prods. and distributed by 20th Television (both are the production and syndication arms of 20th Century Fox). Potentially another court date for Noisey?

    Speaking of court dates, would it be possible to create a banner like the Page Views Last 30 days one listing the upcoming court dates for the three stooges? Also, will the trials still proceed under the current martial law/coup situation?

  3. Ah yes, Drew at Ekkamai bus station (hard times Drew?)… I guess you missed the bit where he turns this shameless selfie into "organising a seminar with the army" in a months time.. he deleted those comments soon after, I guess after realising how ridiculous it sounds.

  4. Hi Andrew, why not have a photoshop competition featuring Noyes with all great leaders of the past? In fact any picture of historical significance, with Noyes super imosed, would be most entertaining. For example, Noyes with Buzz Aldrin on the moon, Noyes with Moses and the ten commandments etc. In fact we need a Noyes meme that would go viral: likewise for Goudie. I would be willing to donate a few thousand baht for the winner. Oh what fun to be had…

    1. But as Goudie and Noyes are still trying to prosecute me in court not for calling them crooks but for using W's excellent pictures I could run with this!

  5. Nice Link Lee. He says ''The seminar has nothing to do with the soldier at the bus station. haha'' My bet is that in one months time (30/6/2014), It will have nothing to do with reality either.

  6. A few years back the owner of this site was called a wanker. We have Drew Noyes reporting on himself as if somehow he is newsworthy. What a wanker.
    Nice to see Drew and Sifu have made up after there falling out a few years back over a property development in East Pattaya. Easy to see where Drew is coming from using Sifu's army connections. When I think of Thailand's biggest wanker, these names keep coming up.
    So Drew has organised a seminar for sexpats to meet the army leaders to assist with sexpat problems in Pattaya? Bullshit Drew. Absolute and utter bullshit. Next you will be telling us that Thaksin is rumored dead!

    1. I do not think that Sifu could have "made up" with that vermin, no way, Sifu is a very intelligent and decent man to associate himself in any way again to Drew. In the old times when Drew was still trying to approach Sifu and come under his influence circle I was free lancing video reports and documentaries. Drew was after any material that could bring him close to Sifu, one which he was very eager and "urgent" to have was from a Loy Kratong festival on the beach where Sifus pupils made an impressive demonstration of their learned skills and Sifu himself presented a Martial Arts show of talent and force, Drew would do anything in order to please Sifu to gain his confidence because he was in the process of achieving partnership in a real
      estate project . Also he was very keen on the video of Sifu's Police Force terrorism defense tactics course. The third one was the promotional video we did on the Real Estate project together with my colleague Brent Madden who was here on holidays and worked on editing it for three days to have it ready for Carrefour's inauguration where there was a Real estate fair opened by the mayor and local politicians who Drew also wanted to impress.
      Today Sifu knows Drew much better and I am sure he cannot be used and scammed again by Drew. Today two people have been wrongly judged and condemned by our local public opinion, these two have created and achieved great efforts translated into successful institutions that benefited thousands of people. Both have had a rather "wild" side of life in their youths in their home country, those times the world was in a process of big change, Vietnam, Rock and Roll, Hippies, Sex liberation, nudity, in Sweden I went to Circus shows where strip tease was in the program while there was a huge children audience, they found it funny…Sifu was a Bouncer who got caught in underworld skirmishes and ended up in prison. Niels Colov was in his native Denmark where sexual revolution was accepted very naturally, somehow similar Amsterdam in Holland. They are being judged by their past, in situations so particular to those times. People who have not lived in those countries would never understand, Niels was fighting Drew alone for a long time through his newspaper, but people then preferred to believe in Drew, that what made Drew start his own paper… I worked then for both and other media in Pattaya, one amazing act I remember from Niels was his support of the Fallu Ghong Chinese people who had taken refuge in Thailand and had nowhere to live, Niels then asked me to go there where they were and offer them logistic,shelter and food help and whatever else they needed knowing that they were not welcome by the local authorities because of Chinese Government pressure who wanted the deported back to China and imprisoned. Niels and Sifu have done more for Thai local and National community than maybe any other foreigner in present times. People should be very well informed and careful when judging others. In my country, Brazil, Ronald Biggs the big Bank Robber was a hero and loved by all who knew him . When he was kidnapped and taken to Barbados to be deported to England the then Brazilian Foreign Minister threatened Barbados with cutting diplomatic relations if Biggs was not returned immediately, Biggs came back and was taken to the same bar where he was drinking and served a half glass full of Beer to finish the one he had started when he was kidnapped.

    2. What is the collective noun for a group of wankers? A pod of wankers? An American paratrooper who claims he is a lawyer, a Scottish soldier who also claims he is a lawyer and a wannabe SWAT team leader. Knights of Rizals. One can only imagine the bullshit that they must talk about when together. Shrapnel wounds, fierce battles. However it is all in their imagination. I dont know Ivan, but considering he was once a friend of Noyes, and still appears to be friends with Colov and Sifu, i conclude that he is quite a gullible man. Attracted to these fantasist types.

      Noyes and Sifu go back a long way. Did business together, and if you look to the newspaper blog of Noyes you will see they continue to support each other. Dont believe what they tell you Ivan.
      "reports" UPDATED 21 February In an exclusive interview with the Pattaya Times newspaper, Mr. Sifu McInnes said, “I turned myself in last night and was released after being charged and posting bail while police are checking the paperwork about the items found in my Hummer. These false allegations reported in the foreign media are hurting my reputation and affecting my business so I went to the Pattaya Times, which is always fair, to tell my side."
      The Pattaya Times newspaper interviewed “Sifu” Robert McInnes in an exclusive, two-hour interview to get his comments to these serious charges.

      Sifu is about as credible as, well, Drew Noyes and Brian Goudie.

    3. The "Sifu" may well have built up a legitimate martial arts school, but I am asking has this guy got any real qualifications except for the ones he has given himself?

      For example what qualifications does he have to instruct the police or army? Has he served in either? If he is indeed instructing them in martial arts you would want him to have some real grades apart from some story about traveling to China to be taught by some unknown master.

      He is called "Sifu" which is used by Chinese Kung Fu teachers but also claims an 8th dan in a karate style he claims to be the Grand Master of. All under the "World Kumite Organisation" which he runs.

      He even has the cheek to offer certificates offering to recognize other instructors gradings.

      Quote- "The WKO does not do gradings, however, we do underwrite its member’s grades and Dan’s providing proof is supplied by way of certification from the applying instructor’s organization or system. All certificates issued by the WKO are Gold embossed and a small charge for issuing these certificates is applicable. Remember the WKO will only underwrite your current grade providing it can be verified by your system or organization. The charge for these certificates are $50 US, Which includes postage worldwide."

      A lot of martial arts organizations I know of have folded in the last decade due to MMA becoming the big thing and I notice he has signed up a couple of people I know who had no affiliation.

      He has built what looks like a very impressive organization but I question his own grades. I would just like to know who graded him to 8th dan in that karate style and see him explain clearly the story of training in China with that master.

      There are also claims he won 7 world kumite titles. I'm calling 100% bullshit on that.

    4. Pattaya Times online front page still dedicated to McInnes's son after 10 months…. Drew Noyes brown nosing.. no way don't believe it.. McInnes are you partial to a bouquet of flowers?

  7. Andrew, as all journalists know, some days are slower than others on the news front. I admit I enjoy most the stories about the 3 stooges. So even if there is no story about Drew, Bwian of Hanks why not just post their pictures with no text so we can all just rip them for the fun of it. Btw, I started reading Drew's resume and but got bored and fell asleep after 3 hours reading so I managed to read about a third of it. Keep it coming Andrew, you provide entertainment to a captive audience. Thank you.

  8. A number of people have written in to the response by Ivan above. While I sympathise with the posters all have included a libel amongst their prose which I could be held responsible. I cannot edit. Only allow or not allow. Please bear that in mind when writing in. Surprisingly enough I have never been sued for calling certain people a liar, cheat or fraud. I have merely been sued for using people in amusing photo-shopped pictures and mentioning one had a minor wife!

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