The Strange Tale of Drew Noyes And The Icelandic Welsh Scot

 Bangkok September 11 2011

WARNING: If you have found this story by googling Drew Noyes – this will be in the middle of flattering but scarcely credible biographies of himself. Best just google ‘Drew Noyes’ together with ‘myriad lies’
Drew Noyes the American ‘entrepreneur’ in Pattaya has hit back at revelations on this site that many, if not most, of his claimed background credentials are false.

In fact he has taken nearly a whole page of his newspaper the ‘Pattaya Times’ for his ‘ASK Drew Noyes’ column, in which he dishes out his pearls of wisdom on Thai law, to launch a personal attack..

The article was forwarded to me by an outraged reader but on reading the libelous monologue I found it hard to suppress a few chuckles.

Mr. Noyes invented a letter from a an alleged reader called Mangus (sic) Evans, a hotel manager, of Scotland/Jomtien.

Mangus Evans (Drew Noyes) said he had read a story by ‘a wanker’ called Andrew Drummond who had written a story headlined  ‘Farmer Joe loses water-tight lease in Thailand’.

The story was so bad said Mangus that ‘the guy Drummond claimed that British officials were coming here to Thailand just to investigate how Thailand is unjust to foreigners here’.

 Magnus signed off saying: ‘Thank you and I always read your column first’.
I was going to say that ‘hotel managers’ would not usually write ‘wanker’ in letters to editors, but as this is from Pattaya, that’s something I cannot rule out. It’s almost a term of endearment down there. And Noyes is after all writing for a local audience.
 Drew Noyes then offers his legal advice to his imaginary reader the angry Scotsman, whom he now calls at last a more credible Magnus.
But Magnus still remains the most unlikely named Scotsman anybody could have dreamed up  -he could be perhaps though an Icelandic Welshman born in Glasgow.
He calls me a ‘douche’ and says I am selling all my furniture and moving from my low rent apartment in Bangkok to Malaysia. 
Drummond, he said, attacked Thailand while he, Noyes, had helped 4,500 clients and helped 20,000 foreigners for free.

(An almost identical claim made incidentally by a British property developer and fraudster Stan Fry, something of a Pattaya legend in the 90s)
Whats more, he added, Drummond travelled to Pattaya by bus…….  Ouch!

While I wrote in my story that Redbridge Council said they were sending a social worker to Thailand and the council stated this in a letter which Stanyer provided, I do not think the reason was to show how unjust Thailand is to foreigners.
Their issue. which Noyes seemed unable to grasp, is more likely to be the welfare of the children of the marriage who are in council care in the UK.
‘The British Are Coming!”

But we can see where Noyes is going with this in his transparent role as defender of Thai culture, language etc.

Drew Noyes reported: ‘It is misguided, false and just there to make Thailand look bad and show that the British are coming!  No-one is coming, certainly not the British officials Drummond claims! 
“Even if it is true, not even the British Embassy could do anything.  What could a government social worker from Essex, England do?…..
‘Well we contacted the Redbridge Council in Essex and they said they are not planning to send any social workers to Thailand!’
‘Pants on Fire!’

Well you can see another reason why I am chuckling. That must be the first time in living memory a British social worker has discussed personal matters of a ‘client’ with a ‘member of the press’ let alone the, ahem, barely coherent Pattaya Times.
And did he get his writing style while doing his degree in journalism at the University of Tennessee?

Last week we highlighted Noyes’ false claims of being a lawyer, having a journalism degree, allegations that he sold bogus shares as a stock-trader, and claims he was a sexual predator in the United States.
He had been investigated by the Wilmington Morning Star in North Carolina, part of the New York Times group, which also ran an editorial saying: “The case of Drew Noyes serves as a reminder that people aren’t always everything they seem to be……. Drew Noyes is being trailed by lawyers, a phony resume and unflattering accusations.”
Noyes rant went on and on with more bile and would have been more fun except there were lots of paragraphs like the following.

‘As set forth in the Thailand Civil and Commercial Code on Page 292, Book V (Family) Chapter IV, (Property of Husband and Wife Section) Section 1469 as translated by Professor Kamol Sandhikshetrin, LLB, MA, whereby the statute reads:

‘Any agreement concluded between husband and wife during marriage by be (sic) avoided by either of them at any time during marriage or within one year from the day of dissolution of marriage, provided that the rights of third persons acting in good faith are not affected thereby.’

Drew Noyes also seems to be getting tighter into bed with Dirty Dog, ‘Eric’, the East London webmaster at – a website which Noyes sponsors with a banner advertisment. 
(He removed his ‘American lawyer’ tag last week.)

Noyes writes: ‘One major website owner recently wrote. ‘The way to get at Andrew Drummond for writing lies about us is to publish his address on the internet every time he moves…..Kind of like they do to out pedophiles in the UK’.’
Andrew Drummond, he says, is hated by ‘real journalists’ and  businessmen in the real business of printing newspapers.  I think he means himself here?
 Photo: Ranting ‘major local webmaster’ Dirty Dog Hong Kong bound while the passenger seated next to him is perhaps now sensibly pretending to be asleep)
This is an odd marriage.  Drew Noyes tells everyone he loves Thailand and is enchanted with its culture, language etc. 

Dirty Dog,  who more than coincidentally started a post this week actually asking people to supply my address, seems not so enamoured with Thailand.  He also announced that lawyers (Noyes’) were going to Immigration to find out my address..

Dirty Dog, a real Pattaya charmer whose street vocabulary extends far beyond ‘wanker’ , started a thread ‘Fok the British Embassy is shit’ after having difficulties getting his son, whom he never registered as British citizen, a visa to Britain to brush up on his English. He did not want his son to become a ‘Thai idiot’, he said, which, I guess, is not one of the boxes one ticks on a British Visa Application Form. 

He added the British Embassy told him to adopt his son, who has a Germanic surname, and re-apply.  I’m still waiting for the reason why he has to adopt his own son, because he insists he is the father on the birth certificate.

Dirty Dog, aka Eric, is not on a charm offensive either with Thailand, as demonstrated above, or, of course wiith the British Embassy.

Meanwhile it seems Drew Noyes will be producing the ‘Pattaya Times’ himself this week if reports coming out of Pattaya are true. 
Those reports say that both his American-Chinese editor and two Filipina assistants, Rose and Aya, hopped it at the weekend. Despite his myriad claims of donating to charities, his staff are accusing him of short-changing him among other things.

But the paper, if it comes out, will not be much different than normal. It will of course be Drew Noyes under a series of different bylines interviewing himself, plus lots of local reviews to cash in on the freebies. ‘All the news I can use’.
Can’t wait for the next issue but its difficult to find one of the 500,000 copies he claims to print.
Last foreign journalist quits scandal hit Pattaya Times
An American couples’ Noyes nightmare
Read all about it – the great Thai newspaper fraud
Pattaya publisher wanted me as mistress
Thai police deny false claims theyare hunting British journalist
 How and American businessman sold homes for the Thai poor to tourists
 Exposed – Myriad of lies 
Father Christmas sues Pattaya Publisher

37 thoughts on “The Strange Tale of Drew Noyes And The Icelandic Welsh Scot

  1. Germanic surname, cannot get a passport for his 'own' son…maybe he was one of these people suckered into raising someone else' child. If Eric turns up on your front porch, get a photo can you.

  2. Exposing what some forums are craftily and deviously doing here can only be for the better. Thailand is not well served by some forums and their owners

  3. Keep up the good work Andrew, and I guess that ""Drew Walter Mitty"" and ""Hysteric Eric"" will just go on to drive more traffic this way with the mere mention of your easily googled name.

  4. Dear Mr.Drummond,
    Thank you so much. Mr.Drewes said he was looking for a personal assistant on '' and I applied. I read your stories and when I challenged him he got angry. He said you were going to jail. He said to check him out at the Bangkok Post and Nation but I can find nothing. He also told me to look at the letter he got from the Deputy Mayor Carolina Breach. But it was not on the link he gave me. Mr. Noyes removed his advertisment for Filipinos today.

  5. Two comments rejected: One about Noyes's private life. The second from Dirty Dog saying he intends to put up on the internet that I paid 100 baht to escape a child sex abuse charge. That's a Dirty Dog norm. 'Time to past more pictures of you' he adds.
    However in reference to his thread 'Fok the British Embassy sucks' he states that as he did not marry the mother he has no rights over his son. It will take a two year process.
    If the British Embassy does not believe he is the father he can take a DNA test. It has been done, as in the case of David Scott.
    Mr.Scott was not married to the mother of his daughter but the whole family returned to the UK having been given visas by the British Embassy.
    He can also apply for a tourist visa for his son.The Embassy will grant that visa providing he can support himself in the UK and will return to his father in Thailand.

  6. Andrew Mr.Noyes says I am you now! This is what he wrote when I said I could not find anything in the Nation and Bangkok Post

    'One of your better alias! You had me up to the point where you could not find articles in the Pattaya Mail. Even your son could search that you prick! See you soon! Sleep well…'

    PS: I never looked at the Pattaya Mail. He told me to look at the Bangkok Post and Nation

  7. Isobel I'd give you a job if you spoke Thai! You have initiative. Don't bother searching the Pattaya papers though – they are full of publishers and editors having themselves photographed with the local 'gentry'.
    I will pass on those Manila contact to you by email. Good luck

  8. As them Americans say ""you can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig"". can't wait for the next

  9. Another entertaining piece and the best way to prick the bubble of vanity that fantasists of Noyes' calibre strive to inflate at the expense of the unwary and more naive. Eric is another kettle of fish entirely and is increasingly deranged by the day though I'm grateful for his publication of your address and can now add you to my Xmas card list!

  10. Hi Andrew, Thanks for posting that photo of Dirty Dog, I was always curious as to what he looked like .
    I am on his To-Do-List, so I can now sleep a little sounder LOL

  11. Dirty Dog removed the whole ""andrew drummond is a bad boy"" thread from his blog. The heat was turned up about his double standard and his foul mouth. The guy is a looser first class and makes up the rules as he goes. Serious personality disorder, don't know the name for it yet. He actually should change his nick name to soi dog.

  12. Somewhat amusingly an article from Noyes' vanity publication, Pattaya Times, has been posted by Eric in the news forum of his Teakdoor site. It reports that not only have you been arrested Andrew but your site is going to be closed down and you thrown out of the country.Apparently your crime has been to impugn the reputation of Noyes. It's all quite hilarious but not for a reason Noyes would be pleased to hear – if I didn't know better I may have have thought the piece an attempt at parody but alas it is just written so badly one may be forgiven for thinking it was produced by a 12 year old.
    Poor old Eric .The last photo shows why he sports a beard – the chap needs the tonsorial equivalent to a combover to conceal that receding chin and overbite.

  13. Westerby: Yes I am following Noyes' shennanigans quite closely. The Pattaya Times has yet to come out – let me look tho 🙂
    I think it safe to say the the Drummond demise is grossly exaggerated

  14. I have updated 'Exposed – Myriad Lies An American Businessman and Influential People' to include the fact that Drew Noyes has started his own website to try and convince his public that there is no such paper in Wilmington.
    Yes. You just can't make it up! 🙂

  15. Andrew,

    I have heard rumours he is trying via his ' big contacts ' to get you closed down, your blog deleted and you deported. I hope you are ready for any such attack by this clown!

  16. Andrew, Don't forget to thank them for the free publicity. They're not doing their own causes any good, I just can't understand why they don't see that! At the end of the day does Andrew Drummond offer services to the public? NO! Does Drew Walter Mitty pretend to be a Lawyer and offer services to the public.. YES!

  17. Well he has tried one illegal move which he may regret because it involved a local officer acting beyond his remit. However I believe the authorities in Pattaya and Chonburi are slowly coming around to the idea that he could be a major liability.
    Currently Mr.Noyes is running around like the proverbial blue arsed fly. Does not know who his friends are.
    But why actually give credence to anything he says? What I have exposed so far is only the tip of the iceberg here as I am finding out.

  18. Please expose the bottom half of the Noyes iceberg…sure its cold and shrivelled down there…but the public need to know…sometimes Thai politics just ain't funny enough by itself.

  19. Poor DirtyDog keeps sticking posts up about his ""sponsor"" Drew, but anything that exposes Noyes as the raving nutter that he is gets deleted immediately.

    It's almost as amusing as DD's late night drunken rants against Niels Colov, in which he rants about the supposed threats against him.

    These two must have shared the same padded cell somewhere.

  20. Your website is still up? I thought the police guy in charge of cyber crimes in Thailand had ordered your site shut down immediately.

  21. Topper:You should not believe anything you read written by Drew Noyes in the Pattaya Times Topper.

  22. To be honest Andrew I thought you were just going on a bit about this guy and being entertaining in general. But the fake website is really over the top. Not only is it completely libelous but when you think about what kind of a nutter would think up such a plan, it gives me a giggle. It really is not to be missed.

    I like that he apparently decided that while he was getting hits he should use it to drive traffic to the his paper's site. Any publicity is good publicity in his mind. It reminds me of that line from the movie Hoosiers. ""There are two kinds of stupid. One gets naked and howls at the moon and the second does it in my front yard. The second you kind of have to deal with"". Hey Drew, put some clothes on and go in the house.

  23. So far as I can see, the only ""answer"" to Andrew Drummond's detailed and innovative probe has been to threaten and abuse him. Assuming there are open minded people still around, I think they would appreciate some reasoned explanation of what exactly Andrew has supposedly fabricated, if anything. But simply hissing threats, spite and hate at Andrew actually promotes the journalist's website and the base of his support both farang and Thai. Look how the number of hits is still growing! Incidentally, you can now find the September 16 issue of Pattaya Times around town – piles of free ones too if you are desperate to save 20 baht.

  24. Thanks Andrew, another superb article high lighting the undesirables in Pattaya. I am surprised you did not yet delve into his marital track record which make other sociopaths blush from envy.
    Here we go.
    Ex in the USA with one son, Blake
    Ex in Bangkok with one son, no detail thus unconfirmed
    Ex in Pattaya, Nitthaya, four kids and dumped for Kung (see below)
    Concurrently during his marriage to Nitthaya a woman (Gig he calls them) Angelie with one daughter
    Ex (yep, by now ex as well) Kung with 3 kids and dumped as well for Naam who divorced her legal husband for she believed Drew would take care of her for the rest of his live;-)
    This is why he proudly proclaims he is the loving father of ten, he conveniently forgets between four wive's legally married or not from which one is illiterate. He let her sign lots of paperwork, here and in the US. You may call this a track record by any standard, a track record of leaving broken families behind and lovely kids without a father. You may mail me for proof if you want.

  25. My contribution to the Drew Noyes caper, is this, regarding his standing (or non standing)within the Pattaya (read Thailand) community.
    I was invited to be the English editor for the PT broadsheet by Noyes two and a half years ago after a one year period as English video editor of Capital TV in Bangkok.
    He paid one months rent for me (6000 Baht) at the now infamous Kanya's Hotel Jomtien, and at the end of the first Months employ, offered me an extra 3000 Baht. On my repeated inquiry, he submitted the excuse that his previous Thai wife had ""just"" cleaned out his bank account of 3 Million Baht and had no money in his account.
    I also have worked for Niels Colov as the news translator / reader (previously 2005 – 2006)for his now defunct PPTV, and I can honestly say that NC was at least unpretentious about his background, and almost revels in his notoriety. Not so Mr. DN, who stretches the envelope of credibility with his ""PAPPA"" mini empire.
    I, and all the (then) Thai staff have left, and his leaking boat of a stupid publication broadsheet newspaper, that lifted 99% of all it's story content from week old AAP news is a joke.
    Drew Noyes deserves the highest condemnation about his stupidity and illegality.
    Oh, did I mention that a Work Permit was never ever mentioned not withstanding his ""close association"" with the Thai Police authorities.

    Sadly, Mr. Noyes doesn't drink, because if he was ever caught in a bar in downtown Pattaya, I think his personal safety may be very fragile.

    I can say with impunity, as I now live back in Sydney Australia, where laws of defamation require substance, authority, and real evidence.
    I pity those who feel that in Thailand they can't speak out against these creeps, who portray themselves as community soothsayers.

    Go have a look at his ""Linked In"" site. Whew!!

    Americans invented Baloney, and Drew Noyes has introduced it to expatriate media in Pattaya.

    Keith Elphick (yes my real name)

  26. Have just attended my first Pattaya expat meeting. You have certainly got them talking about this Drew lawyer guy. Too many stories to mention.Missing money from tsunami collections, employing friends relatives and not paying them, unpaid accounts, a radio station called tits,fist fights breaking out at meetings and him running out the back door, his rivalry with Neil from the other newspaper and him trying to copy everything he does and failing miserably, royal polo events in Pattaya and he even invented a cure for Aids that was announced at one of the meetings. Was most impressed with his success with the ladies. They say he owns 100 condos in Pattaya full of his women. Maybe thats why he discovered the Aids cure. How does he do it. It seems nobody can resist his charms. He must put Viagra in his breakfast just to keep up.This guy is talented to say the least. Read his years of service to the King. He certainly has been busy. Saw his photo and it was nothing like what I was expecting. He looks normal. While I wouldnt consider using his legal services I do hope I meet him in person one day but not with my wife. Have to keep attending the meetings as he speaks every month. A Pattaya legend. Looking forward to the next installment.

  27. Gordon. Thank you for your post. Much as I may have like have approved it to your note contained way too much information.

  28. I'm one of the Filipinas working for Drew before. I saw an article on the Pattaya Times website that promised working visa and air fares and a high salary to work in Pattaya for Drew Noyes. I wanted to do this so I could send money back to my family. After working for one month and with over time and Sunday instead of receiving 15,000 baht plus over times I received only 7,000 baht after Drew took out money for the visa he said he would pay for. My friend who also came over and was promised 12,000 baht was only paid 4,000 baht. We were told to leave the accommodation immediately when we complained about our salary. The visas were tourist visas even though we were working in his legal office. When I left to find a job that paid more Drew rang my mom and dad and told them I got sick because I went to a bar and got drunk and didn't come to work. I was really sick and he knew it because he saw me. I never went to a bar in Pattaya when I was there. When in Pattaya my friend and I met a American couple who when we said we were working for Drew felt sorry for us and bought us dinner and gave us 200 baht. They then took us to an internet cafe and showed us the truth about Drew on the noyeswatch site. What we had heard about Drew we hoped was just rumor but it was actually was worst than what was written about him. We both came to send money back to our families but ended up they had to send money to us and we lost money we could not afford to lose.

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  29. What a pathetic individual Drew Noyes is. Cuts the girls salary and then rings up her family to threaten them and lies and says she was in a bar.I imagine she is quite young, only a child as she is living with her parents and he is a 47,er 55 year old.

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