Flying Sporran’s Diary

Noyes with Thai police and military

Thailand’s Police Commissioner Police General Somyot has ordered that his Immigration Police clean up its act. This was prompted by the fact that members of alleged Erawan Shrine bombing gang say they could cross the Thai border by paying a fee of US$600.

Personally of all my favourite illegal Thai border crossing several were into Burma to see heroin warlord, Khun Sa (Chan Shi Fu), where one simply took the path by-passing the border post, preferably in a mule train.

 In fact on occasions our presence was so large – mules carry film stock in cans – sound man’s booms etc. – that my group could be spotted from outer space.

And we could chat to Border Police (actually not part of the Immigration department) in Khun Sa’s camp, complete with bars and brothels.

But my most favourite illegal border crossing was that of my 7-year-old daughter Annie whom I simply told to walk with me across the Cambodian border last year in full view of Thai and Cambodian officials.

She did that merely by pretending to be in the queue and then walking on, waiting for me to join her. (I did it legally. Annie’s Thai passport was out of date). Thankfully everything was put in order by Cambodian’s Interpol chief shortly afterwards – and I even got a British Embassy letter.

Anyway Somyot is concerned that terrorists can get into Thailand by merely paying a fee. He seems less concerned about foreign criminals getting into Thailand which has always been a great source of income to the Immigration Department.

In fact if you have cash and a good record of criminal activity statistically your future must be assured in Thailand much more than if you were say a British pensioner with a young Thai wife (on all levels). In Pattaya it must be a racing certainty.


There is of course a free flow of criminals paying bail to go home as demonstrated by the David Hanks racketeering case. (Hanks, 66, was charged with racketeering in Pattaya but all Russian witnesses and Russian co-defendant simply hopped it), but also strong evidence that the local Immigration Department has been working to the request, and possibly cash, of Drew Walter Noyes.

Noyes has of course been convicted of extortion and is appealing his conviction (His case comes up again on October 22 if he returns) but he gets an immigration police and military escort, and also managed to get a former employee and Pattaya Times reporter (Ivan Schiffer) deported to Brazil.

But more recently Noyes organized the arrest of Thor Halland (account coming soon) on charges of extortion, somewhat of a Noyes specialty, from a very dubious Frenchman with a history in France of trafficking in drugs.


This case was not taken to Pattaya Police but Immigration who have been working hand in mouth with Noyes for years – so hand in mouth that Noyes’ Pattaya Times printed out their Immigration visa forms.

Currently Drew Noyes’, as reported here is advertising his Keha Condominiums not only through Brit Eric Meadows but extensively through LuxEstate, Pattaya, run by a Belgian called Dirk van Opstal.

Opstal has a very colourful immigration and European history and Noyes is reported to have done him a few favours in the past.  More of this later.

Meanwhile Dirk is advertising Noyes’ ‘Athena’ Gentleman’s Club in Jomtien for 1,75000 baht.

But for that you get nothing and then have to pay Bt55,000 a month rent. Noyes needs key money,  and by past actions from as many people as possible.

This was another of Noyes failed business ventures.  He can attend these sort of clubs but certainly not run one.  Buyer beware.

But what amused me most was Dirk van Opstal’s statement.  “Probably the only legal gentleman’s club in Pattaya and surrounding areas”

What? Gentlemens Club are illegal in Thailand. Where on earth can you get your Times ironed and served with a strong cup of Darjeeling?

But of course Gentlemens’ Club in the Pattaya form are not legal and these cannot be confused with the Gentlemen’s Clubs of Mayfair, London. In Pattaya they are of course ‘knocking shops’.  But they are breaking the law by allowing sex to take place on the premises.

Noyes has built a separate entrance for the club’s rooms – hence the claim.

Dirk van Opstal is a friend of course of not only Drew Noyes, but also Jan Jansen the weird Dutchman, one time online casino operator, who runs a pseudo news website out of Phuket.

Jansen was also a star with Noyes at the Silom 310D majority Indian-Thai Lions Club on the basis presumably that it is easier to get elavated where people do not know whom you are.

Jansen, Noyes, Naam

Incidentally the date  by which Immigration Police have had to clean up their act – September 23 – has now passed.


  1. The problem is Andrew that none of this ever appears in the mainstream Thai press where it would cause waves and a lot more action in bringing these crooks to attention. You are now in a prime position to attack the likes of Hanks Noyes etc without the risk of dozens of Thai court writs. As you may have read today the News of the World 'fake sheik' stitched so many innocent people up over the years in the UK but now the tables are turned with his past coming back to haunt him. I admire your efforts and the risks you have taken over the years but you need to employ some Noyes type tactics to bring these crooks to the point where they are cornered.

    1. I think the problem is that the mainstream Thai press is extremely xenophobic and has little interest about what foreigners get up to unless it is a negative story about what the foreigner might have done to a Thai.They know their police, lawyers etc are corrupt. They know their politicians are corrupt. Half of their journalists are on the make. Actually I have spoken to almost agency going in Thailand and all report what an unsatisfactory state of affairs it is and do little. And of course Embassies no longer act as they would have in times gone by.. No comparison to the fake sheik though. Investigative journalism in the UK has fallen through the floor. The reason is the ever increased secrecy. The illegality of whistle blowing – and the damage the News of the World and many other newspapers using the same tactics on stories which were so trivial is almost laughable..and that the masterminds – the Editors – got away scott free. I do not like the methods of the sheik. His prosecution is probably more political than anything else.The newspapers had it coming to them. Ironically the end result is that the media is worse as a result.

    2. Andrew,

      I have been of the opinion for a long time now that the NoW and the Sun were deliberately undermining serious journalism as a means of removing the trust the general public have in journalism and papers.

      Keep the masses happy with trivia while undermining their willingness to question anything that the real power brokers are up to.

    3. I think you are right Andrew. His fuse is lit and it is only a matter of time. I wrote a fairly innocuous comment on another site and recieved innumerable emails from him along with the usual legal threats. For all I know he may actually have filed something, as I am no longer in Thailand and have no desire or intent of going back I could not be bothered. The point remains that the coming alterations to the Thai power bases is inevitable, as is the coming power struggle (despite the attempts of the current regime, that dog will simply not hunt) and for fence straddlers/hoppers like Big Noise the end is near. As time marches on, even if Duh-rew gets out of his current mess his options are limited and his prospects few. Since he is completely 'nanners this will probably mean even more irrational acts of desperation like the "gentle man's" club dream that didn't even last long enough to open.

  2. The good thing of course is we have an ever expanding internet media which has diluted the press barrons ruling over whatbwe read and see. Private Eye also does a really good job in the UK of exposing stories newspapers refuse to print. Take a look at the Lowick One…

    Here we have a publican who fell foul of a local health inspector and a magistrate.He ended up in prison and fined heavily before the whole case was overturned recently. In over a decade he was prosecuted three times when there was only one other prosecution from the local authority. Maurice Kirk is a former veterinary surgeon who spent a couple of years in prison and mental hospitals despite never being convicted of anything demanding a prison sentence.

    I hope you are enjoying life in the UK and earning a decent crust. Much as I enjoy Thailand I am very much aware of the precarious position most westerners have in the country. My advice to anyone thinking of living there is keep most of your funds in the UK and always accept that cash invested in Thailand is a one way street. It will rarely come back.

    I think you made a wise move coming back. I am sure there were many times when you must have looked over your shoulder.

  3. There is a lot more about Dirk Van Opstal and his criminal history in Belgium and the ongoing fraud and immigration crimes in Thailand as well as his real estate Scams and rip offs in Thailand. Thefts Bribing Immigration officials and druu. Noise main bribery king pin who is the colorful dressed older women an wife of Thai police commander In many of noise photo pops MADAM ROSE….SHE IS THE KEY HOLE NOISE AND OPSTAL DROP MILLIONS OF THB TO BE DISTIBUTED BRIBES AND PAY OFFS TO HAVE CRIMINAL CASE'S AND IMMIGRATION FILES COMPLETELY ERASED …. $$$$$$$$$$ FOLLOW THE MONEY

Comments are closed.