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The audience at the Pattaya City ExPats Club eagerly awaits the pears of wisdom from American Drew Noyes as he takes centre stage with his new Ipad. He tells us how he came to Thailand by proclamation. And soon this ‘friend of royalty’ from Jefferson High, Knoxville, Tennessee, has his audience eating out of the palm of his hand.

His enthusiasm shone out as he told the audience how:

In 1997 there was an Asian financial crisis and seven tiger nations in South East asia were all in serious trouble. I was an investment banker. I have a Service 3, ,7, and 24 investment licence….My uncle ( not printable) rang me up one day and said:

Drew Noyes – Groping with the crisis – Pattaya Mail

He who swoops like and eagle (He always had an Indian name for everybody) Would you like to go to Thailand?’ 

And I said ‘No uncle. I am arbitrating on foreign markets and I have about ten seconds left to talk to you’.

 And he said ‘Put that all on hold. You talk to me! I am your uncle!’

I said okay. And he started telling me about this Land of Smiles and how Thailand was Thailand because that meant free people and how it’s never been westernised or imperialised and these things went on for about twenty minutes and he knew more about Thailand than I do about America.

I was just amazed by it.

Anyway his Majesty had put a Royal Proclamation asking for people to intellectually transfer their talents to Thai people who were working at a disadvantage. So 26 Americans came over to Thailand to work with the Bank of Thailand and the Stock Exchange of Thailand to try and get things in order.

From Drew Noyes’ Pattaya Times. Pinch of salt needed

My idea was to come out here and see whether there really were Thai sticks in Thailand. Did they really Thai-dye things…but I was not planning on staying by any stretch of the imagination. 

And I was single and 41 years old. I have been here for two months. We were treated amazingly well. We had full access to everybody we wanted to talk to. We were treated almost like Ambassadors because we had flown here for nothing. It was all at our own expense to try and come and help. 

They were determining what banks would survive; what banks wouldn’t. Thailand was the first country to ask for IMF funding. 

They were the first to get it and they were the first to pay it back. So the reason I came was strictly business and when the time was up I got an opportunity through the US Embassy to apply for a special visa under the Treaty of Amity based on being people helpful whereby I was able to do any business Thai people can do. 

So I cannot own real estate but I can own a real estate company and a newspaper and this that and the other.”

He then goes on to say how people in Chonburi do not care what happens in Bangkok, that’s why everyone is sabai how there are few homeless people in Thailand, a country with less than 1 % unemployed, and how easy it is to do business. Not even noodle carts need licences, he said.

Comment: What business was Mr. Noyes coming to Thailand to do? Mr. Noyes actually came to Thailand and first opened beer bars in Pattaya before re-inventing himself as a lawyer. Seems the Treaty of Amity in his interpretation is quite all encompassing. But it does not cover publishing newspapers and buying property. In the United States (San Jose) there was already a judgement out against him for selling bogus shares, last year updated to US$72,000, and his property shenanigans and complaints of sexual harassment by women had been reported in the Wilmington Star newspaper in North Carolina. But Drew was on a roll in Thailand. As for his ‘ love of the Thai people’ his One Stop Legal Services specialises ( not very successfully) at getting money and property back from Thai wives. He in in the courts for allegedly pocketing 2.5 million a foreigner wanted to give his ex-girlfriend in a settlement.


  1. Gifted orators usually read from an iPad.

    Andrew, just to clarify your transcription, in your third quote you have arbitrate versus arbitrage. It's actually more hysterical that he's used the phrase "arbitraging on the foreign markets currency". There is literally no ForEx guy that would phrase things that way. And the fact that he gave his assistant the hand-off indicates he has no idea what a trading assistant does. They've got zero authority to on or off risk positions. The closest they get to trading is idea generation for their trader. What a dope.

  2. Let me see if I've got this straight. His uncle, who was a famous architect in New York, worked on World Peace projects, at the United nations, with the King of Thailand's older sister? He who swoops like an eagle,talks bull$hit like a champion. Did people actually believe this crap?

  3. He talks about 'Thai Sticks', the only Thai Stick I know is the one in which the old good reef was rolled on a thin bambu stick, Drew would smoke socially but maybe not inhale….also said once that his brother was a 'pot head', while he himself is a lying head, there he goes on his rant about being somehow close to the highly respected and revered Thai Royal Family, how come a disgraced sick bandit as this coward North American dare associate himself to the Thai Royals, he is bringing shame and abuse publicly declaring such an absurd lie. He should be immediately prosecuted in order to have the same public he lied to warned and aware that this man is a danger to any society where he sets up business.

    There must be a way to explain to the authorities about his scam tactics disrespecting the most sacred Thai laws by associating his criminal behavior to High level Thai Institutions and Personalities.

    Just go into his office to see two giant pictures that hang from the ceiling to the floor of their Majesties. Now isn¨t that a perfect example of hypocrisy on his part. If one respects the laws and the Royals it is unacceptable that he uses the office for fraudulent , abusive and dishonest activities at the same time declaring eternal love for the country.

    This scam tactic should also be presented as soon as possible to the 'Ombudsman^ in order to be exposed in its detailed context and with recommendation to be scrutinized by the special 'Lese Majeste' Comitee….they would surely forward it to the courts for trial.

    Let us not forget about the Phillipinas who were abused by Drew Walter Noyes, being lured to work for high salaries, work permit and room and board, having after their working time discovered that this madman only wanted to force his degenerate sexual instincts on the girls.
    They had to leave empty handed and suffering all kinds of threats.The Paper's editor at the time a young American was so pissed and revolted that he stopped working there after only a few weeks. Everyone who worked with or associated to Drew in any form or business ended up becoming his enemy .

    How Drew can live in a town among a society that hates him, knowing that he cheated and scammed many, many descent honest people, living an absurd phantasy which resembles more of a 'goofy'.

    He is always referring to people in high positions either by their names or titles in order to impress new comers, make them believe that these people would be giving him any kind of support.

    In my country we call this ' masturbating with the other guy's cock' ,
    He does not even feel ashamed to put his various families under the spot light. His children have and will have to share the shame consequently cannot be proud of their father in any way, they are growing up fast and they know the truth,

    To Drew there is no escape from this, I guess there will be no place to hide, as we say in my country,
    'if you run the animal will catch you, if you stay the animal will eat you' it is just a question of time, some people say, no big deal, in Thailand one can pay his way out, meaning that you could just pay and leave and the entire court system would allow to be fooled. My suspicion is that it does not really work out like that anymore…Which Prosecutor and Criminal Judge would ruin his carreer, honor, name and future by corrupting himself and at the same time associating himself with this scumbag.

    There obviously is a limit to how far and low these gentlemen would go. Which Judge would throw out all the years studying Law and not applying his knowledge in such clear case.

    The new General Prosecutor of Thailand comes from a humble family, his Father was a common worker as well as his mother, he says that all 4 brothers graduated from University, his honor and distinction in a life time of hard work and studies, no way Drew can have the slightest chance to not be charged accordingly, do not doubt that the Thai Legal System cannot take care of this crook.
    More later,

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